Spiceologist

Todays entry is gonna be odd. Why is a boudoir photographer doing a blog on spices? Because foo, I CAN. To me this wasn’t that big of a leap. To me, boudoir is a treat for the senses. Its about erotica, and the forbidden. The spiceologist people have gotten this down to a science. Spiceologist doesn’t use half naked models to sell their wares or advertise in Playboy. They don’t need to. With no hesitancy I can tell you these are some of the best spices I have ever put in my mouth.

This is my second purchase with Spiceologist. How did I hear about this company? Remember when I was San Francisco? I randomly went into this place called Sur La Table. I had never heard of it, and was probably intoxicated. A guy that worked there was totally into selling me things. This knife is faaaaaaaabulous, buy it before I stab you with it. Then he picked a bottle off the shelf and (which turned out to be spiceologist honey habanero) he started hitting me in the side of the head with it. This stuff is just faaaaabulous. You have to try it, buy it or i’ll kill your family. Faaaaaaabulous. I ended up buying it.

I want to set the record straight before you all get any ideas. I am not getting any money from Spiceologist say all this great stuff. Trust me, I tried to get a discount and Heather (the co-founder) sent a KGB hit squad to take me out. Fortunately they got my address wrong and went to those annoying loud neighbors that play rap music 24 hours a day. The KGB massacred the entire house. Thanks Heather! What I actually ended up ordering was the “top 8 rub set”.

So who are these mysterious people that make these awesome spices? How do they have ties to the KGB?

You can see a bio on the two founders on the video above. If you listen carefully you can hear slight Russian accents and their seems to be a automatic pistol with a silencer attached on the table. Further proof these two are actually KGB assassins. More importantly, the spices they make do NOT have that MSG crap that a lot of the spices you buy at the grocery have! Lastly,according to their website, Heather and Pete employ three other assassins who may also be employed by the Japanese Yakuza. Lauren (seductive stabber) Seth (dashing death dealer) and Jordan (pretty poisoner).

Truth to be told, I have only tried a few of these spices. See that “greek freak” up there? Next time you order pizza, sprinkle some on there. Its freakin phenomenal!

That’s all for this week! Thanks for being with us for another year! Become a fan on the Oni Studio boudoir facebook page. Follow Oni Studio on 500PX, Pinterest, and Model Mayhem!

San Francisco

A few months ago I had to travel to San Francisco for work.

I had never been there and was pretty excited to go. I had heard all kinds of things about the place. Now I am not a fan of hippies. I knew San Francisco was the epicenter of the hippie movement back in the sixties. I found the nomadic unwashed nature of the hippies extremely distasteful. Peace and love my ass. How unmetal can you get!?

The music too, bleah!!! Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix and the Grateful Dead suck beyond all comprehension.

With all these complaints why would I choose to write about it? Because there was a dark side to San Francisco I was eager to explore. Alcatraz? Nah, too touristy.

San Francisco was the setting of one of the most famous serial killers of all time. The Zodiak. This serial killer operated in San Francisco in the 1960’s and despite one of the most massive manhunts in Police history he was never caught. I ended up searching San Francisco from high to low but never found the Zodiak.

San Francisco was also home to Anton Lavey who started the Church of Satan in the 1960’s. Anton Lavey (or Ragnar Redbeard) wrote one of my favorite passages of all time. “Hate your enemies with a whole heart, and if a man smite you on one cheek, SMASH him on the other!; smite him hip and thigh, for self-preservation is the highest law!” Happy positive words! Before you get your panties in a twist I’m not a member of the Church of Satan. Although I would love to be neighbors with them.

I started my journey to find out this cities dark secrets in the Fishermans Wharf district. Nothin weird here. Just lots of bars. Also, people walking their dogs and homeless people. I don’t look down on the homeless, i’ve been down on my luck before and know just how easy it is to fall into despair.

Wait a minute; wasn’t “Big Trouble in Little China” set here? Maybe ole Jack Burton could give me a tour!

The first night I walked for what seemed like forever. Bar after bar. I think five hours into my walk I could have been picked up for public intox.

Finally I wondered into what I thought was the last bar of the night. Sitting to my right was one of those gorgeous blondes you see in magazines.   Hey, why not buy her a drink. Fast forward and we leave together for one of the greatest nights ever. I really have to stress that things like this never happen to me. A lot of people see the models I work with and assume I’m some type of Hugh Heffner. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact I’m more likely to go to Barnes and Noble than I would a bar.

When it was all said and done, I enjoyed my trip to San Francisco. I made a lot of great memories and met some great people. Also, I got the greatest kitchen knife and dinner plates from Sur La Table, hells yes!

That’s all for this week! Become a fan on the Oni Studio boudoir facebook page. Follow Oni Studio on 500PX, Pinterest, and Model Mayhem!